You don't leave a little I love you
letter for someone just because
unless you're pretty fucking smitten.
Spike, otherwise what she'd consider a tough guy, is pretty fucking smitten.
Beth can't say she minds.
And it's kind of funny. The first time he told her he thought he was falling for her, she'd though it was great to hear but probably not really true and hardly a surprising way for him to think he felt after they'd both shown up here, hit it off, and been sleeping together for about a month or so.
After a while she couldn't keep doubting he actually felt that way, and no, she's never minded at all.
When she wakes up, yawning, and gets up to find the note he left tented on the table, she moves to one of her drawers and opens it to fish out a folded piece of paper.
list, the one she originally started on his birthday. And this is a good opportunity to finish it.
About twenty minutes later, the shower's running and a new note is tented on the table so Spike can see it when he gets in. It's an invitation to join his favorite pregnant chick in the shower if he gets back in time, but lying flat on the table beneath it is a neatly written list of things she missed about him while she was in Cooksfield:1. your hands
2. your shoulders
3. those significant little barely-there smiles
4. your scars (And if I were to cheat, I'd list the one Vincent left on you separately)
5. the goddamn skinny tie
6. your voice
7. your magic tricks
8. the way you smell
9. those three-word phrases you're so fucking good at
10. the way your eyes don't quite match
11. your jawline
12. you kissing me awake
13. sharing cigarettes
14. that way you grab my hips like I'm the only vital thing you can get your hands on
15. your shirtless workouts
17. showers together
18. mornings when we can't seem to make ourselves get out of bed
19. the way you look at me
20. just walking upstairs with you after spending part of the night in the bar
21. reading to each other
22. target practice together
23. how your hair feels between my fingers
24. how cool and calm you often are
25. all those "Zen things"
26. Telesto Pops
27. waking up in the middle of the night and having your arms around me
28. your stories
29. back rubs
30. your tendency to understate
31. your stubbornness
32. how fucking sharp you are
33. your habit of being surprisingly noble when the situation calls for it
34. that all-action, almost businesslike way you get when you're after a bounty
35. you're just about fearless
36. your sense of humor
37. swimming in the lake together
38. the way you seem to get so focused when you clean your gun
39. you always eat with chopsticks
40. the way you trace the scar across my face
41. unbuttoning the buttons on your Venusian vanilla shirts
42. and borrowing those same shirts
43. your habit of not being able to turn down a good challenge
44. the knack you have for being able to keep promises I know you'd try your hardest to follow through on but probably shouldn't be able to
45. trips to other planets
46. martinis for two
47. potechi (and never making it through a plate)
48. sex (please keep in mind these are in no particular order)
49. you got a nanobot shot so you wouldn't have to worry about having kids
50. you already love the baby I'm going to have
51. getting joyrides in the Swordfish
52. your impossibly tough-guy moments
53. the way you sometimes end up stretched out with a book over your face
54. you're such a fucking survivor
55. (last but certainly not least) your Y chromosome
She had no intention of duplicating his original 100 or making this
into some kind of competition, but there is a note at the end that 54 is two times (while two is roughly the number of years he's been here) the age he was when he arrived at bar. She thought 54 kind of sucked as a number to end things on, and it wasn't hard at all to come up with a 55th thing she missed about him.
There's nothing about how she first started a list on his birthday while she was in Cooksfield, though she'll tell him if he asks about it. There's another thing that goes unsaid, too, and it's that writing out a list like this and giving it to him isn't really her style. She's got her moments, but she's not an incurable romantic by any means. It's true that she probably wouldn't have thought to do this if things hadn't happened like they did. But she promised herself that she'd give Spike the list if she ever saw him again.
And she can keep her promises as well as he can.